Power Together: The Melody of I Am and The Symphony of We Are – Rev. Darrell Jones
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DESCRIPTION
We come together in so many circles. Work teams, family, friends, neighborhoods, spiritual and religious community and more. In these circles are many voices contributing to a larger whole. One of the most joyous and difficult exercises in our humanity is coming together. Join us this Sunday as we explore the divine balance of singing our own powerful melody in harmony with all the songs, notes and rhythms in the circles of life around us.
SUMMARY
Rev. Darrell Jones discusses the importance of coming together and working in harmony, using the analogy of an orchestra. He emphasizes that unity does not mean uniformity, and that respecting and honoring differences is key to the true power of the collective. He talks about the need for mindfulness, emotional intelligence, and humility when working in groups. Individuals must balance their own power and voice with the needs of the collective. Rev. Darrell offers questions for self-reflection to help people navigate these dynamics, and closes with an affirmation about honoring diversity of perspectives within a community.
TRANSCRIPTION
This transcription was auto-generated, please excuse typos, errors and omissions.
Rev Darrell Jones (00:00):
All right, the year’s 1985, I’m wearing pink Chuck Taylor, high tops Bermuda shorts down to here. And all I do is ride skateboards. I’m sitting in Matt Jackson’s living room because we don’t have cable and they do. And I turn on MTV and that song is number one. Anyone know what movie it was in Back to the Future? Back to the Future. My fellow Gen Xer. Good morning everybody. What? Shaken the power of love. The power. Power, the art of power. I love, I’ve been fascinated by putting the art of in front of anything because it just kind of makes you stop for a minute. The art of making perfect eggs. You have to think about it. You got to prepare for it. It’s not something you just throw together. The art of a perfectly tied shoelace.
(01:06):
The art of anything. So the art of power, it really has had me in this deep contemplative space thinking about power, thinking about what power means to me. And there’s been talks already this week on personal power, the power within, and today we’re going to explore a little bit more about power, but in the context of us coming together, and many of you know I have a background in music, so this is what spurred our talk title today, the power. So exploring “power together, the melody of I am and the symphony of we are.” The power of We is what we’re talking about today. So we all have these circles that we travel in, that we live in, that we dance around. We have work teams. Anyone work on a team? Just three of you. Okay? So we work with teams.
(02:08):
Anyone have a family? Whether you like them or not, you have a family, okay? Anyone have friends? Yes. Okay, so we’ve got, you see these concentric circles that are happening here? Anyone live in a neighborhood? Okay, anyone belong to a spiritual community? Okay. And there’s something happening in a couple of weeks voting, this country that we live in another circle. There’s so many circles that we are constantly dancing in and out of that come to the forefront of our attention and not, oops, I need to start my timer. I got a lot of say today. Okay? One of the most joyous and difficult. So there’s a paradox there, and I love that idea of that wherever paradox is happening, God truly is present. One of the most joyous and difficult things on the planet is coming together. It’s awesome to come together and those same people that you love to come together with will drive you crazy.
(03:13):
Today we’re going to explore this divine balance, this divine dance, singing our own powerful melody in harmony with all of the songs, notes and rhythms in the circles of life around us, the practice of coming together and making music. Whether it’s a small group we’ve seen up here today or in a larger orchestra or choir, the musicians have to practice mindfulness in order for it to work. You have to be present. Oh, oh, a little ringtone. You have to practice mindfulness in order for it to work. Sorry, people online. Hi. Be mindful right now. Pay attention to one thing. Just be here. Let go of other things. John Cozen in the seventies didn’t invent mindfulness, but he was the first person to really start researching it, and this is the definition that he used in his research studies. Mindfulness is paying attention to the present moment on purpose. Fair enough? It’s deeper than that. It’s much more complex than that. Paying attention to the present moment on purpose in a particular way. So doing something to actually pay attention to the present moment and then to do it. Nonjudgmentally. Oh, snap. It doesn’t mean that we don’t have opinions, but to be nonjudgmental is more of an internal space of how we respond to the things outside of us.
(04:55):
Harmony is the result of listening. When you’re in a musical group, you have to play loud enough so you can hear yourself, but you can’t play too loud. You have to hear what the other people are doing. You may not be in the same time signature, you may not be playing the right chord, the same notes, you get dissonance. There’s all these things, and if you aren’t really mindful, if you aren’t paying attention, if you don’t have what’s called dual awareness actually where you’re aware of yourself and you’re aware of the others, then train wrecks happen.
(05:36):
Harmony is the result of listening, listening to yourself and listening to others. Can I have the first slide, quote slide. No one can whistle a symphony. It takes a whole orchestra to play it. Now I just saying the opening lines to Beethoven’s fifth in C minor, the power of love is also in C minor. It’s like so meta. There’s these things happening today, people the crazy. Okay, so I never thought I’d ever compare Huey Lewis in the news in Beethoven, but I just did. No one can whistle a whole symphony. It requires the group. It inquires an ensemble. When we come together, magic can happen when we come together. There is a power that is palpable and greater than our individual power. Yes, but like all power, it must be respected and engaged with responsibility. So here’s where we get into principle. If you’ve been around these teachings for a hot minute, you will maybe hear people talk about the law like electricity.
(07:08):
The law doesn’t really have a care. It doesn’t have an opinion. The law just creates like electricity. Electricity doesn’t go, oh, I don’t like those people. I’m not going to vibrate over here through this wire. It just does what it does. Wherever there’s a place for it to go, but we must be responsible with how we use it because the electricity can cook our meal or can cook a person and kill them. It takes great, great responsibility. All power requires respect and responsibility. But this is where we get into trouble, and this is where we get into hardship when we come together. Rarely do we own our and respect our own individual power in the collective, and we lose sight of the fact that the true power of the true power of coming together is respecting and honoring the inherent differences that happen. Wherever two or more gathered, all you got to do is go out to eat. Chances are you’re not going to want to eat the same thing wherever two or more are gathered. There is diversity.
(08:23):
One of the most powerful statements, and I think when he wrote this, it wasn’t in relationship to social issues, it was about the law again, but Earnest Holmes in the book, the Power of This thing called You, one of the first books that really brought me into these teachings. He said, unity never means uniformity. Unity never means uniformity. People look down with that statement makes sense. I think we all get that idea, but I dare say that most of us want uniformity, whether you can argue and kick and scream as much as you want, but if you look at our country right now, regardless of what side or what color you wear, everybody wants uniformity. We just do. And there’s nothing wrong with that because here’s the thing, uniformity is easy. It’s simple, it’s not complex. Let’s all just dress this way. Uniform, right? That’s why we do it in schools so that the kids don’t have to worry about who’s got the new this, that and the other.
(09:40):
When I was 13, what we were wearing in schools, anyone remember wearing Coca-Cola clothing when they did that for a hot minute? It was like everything I had enough money to, I think I got one for Christmas mom. It was this Coca-Cola sweatshirt. It was blue. I wore the mess out of that thing it cost. Then I think it was like $60 or $50. It was a lot of money in 1985. Anyway, uniform. There’s a simplicity in the uniform. There’s a safety even, right? We know what to expect, but in uniformity, there’s only actually so much power. Uniformity is not like power, power, it’s just like power.
(10:25):
The full power of coming together is not found in like-mindedness. So this is my argument. Most of us want to say that we’re super like kumbaya and we love everybody. That’s not the way our nervous system works, and it’s not a judgment. It’s just something we need to get really sober to as a world. The true power of coming together is found in the allness, not the like-mindedness, like-mindedness is good. It’s convenient. We must get together with people that think the way we do because there is simplicity and safety there and it does something for us. But that is not the way nature works.
(11:23):
If you walk into the plains of the Midwest, there is no uniformity in that prairie, but it’s all one ecosystem and they find a way to work together. We must respect this principle if we are truly going to hone and fully embody and express our power together. But it’s not easy work, my friends, anyone up for the challenge? Because it requires effort. I would dare say it even requires sweat and tears. I’m not saying blood, just sweat and tears. It requires effort. When we come together and truly embrace the allness of the divine as our family, our friends, our neighbors, our country, the world, then we must respect and take responsibility for unity does not mean uniformity. This is the art of power together. So let’s come back to that orchestra analogy that I offered. An individual musician, they can play and learn and practice and grow and make amazing music by themselves, but there is an art. When a number of musicians come together, there’s a different listening that’s required. There’s a different skillset that is needed. It requires dual awareness, not duality, but dual awareness. It requires emotional intelligence. It requires emotional maturity. I don’t know if anyone would’ve ever used that language when I was an undergrad saying in order to sing in this choir, you got to have emotional maturity, but you develop emotional maturity in order to be around more than one other person to create something together.
(13:27):
When we come together, the number one is no longer you. Ouch, but you’re the one common denominator. So you are number one. But when we come together, number one is no longer the number one is we. When we are no longer number one or someone pushes to be number one, or maybe priorities shift because there’s three or four of us trying to decide where to go have dinner. That can be a daunting task. We think we’re being disrespected because we’re not number one or we think we’re not cared for or whatever story we may tell ourselves. And chances are the other people in the group that we are associating with trying to get some project done are telling themselves a story as well. Here’s the challenge. We don’t vet those stories that we tell ourselves when we come together.
(14:35):
Oftentimes, we don’t even need someone to do anything. We have stories that we make up and then we walk into the group. Nobody’s going to listen to me. I’m going to go into this meeting now. Hi everybody. This is where our individual work is so critical to be a part of the whole. We must come back to ourselves and this is the reading for today. Could I have the next slide? You are capable of coming back to your best and highest self, but you must maintain this practice. Don’t allow yourself to get distracted and forget to practice. Practice regularly, daily with the support of your family, with your friends and community. This is diligence to bring happiness to others. We must be happiness. And this is why we always train ourselves to first take care of our own bodies, our own minds. Only when we are solid can we be our best and take good care of our loved ones and community. This is why we come together here together. Even though you are here to support the community, this is something ideally that is taking care of your mind and your body and your spirit, not so you can only be a part of this community, but so you can step into Monday powerfully bringing some semblance of happiness, of security, of groundedness, of knowingness, of wholeness into whatever awaits you in the week. Yes.
(16:22):
Here’s something that I don’t think I am still learning this lesson. It’s a new edge of my spiritual growth. Coming together doesn’t mean you have to reduce your light or your power, but it does require a shift out of survival mode as a priority. When we come into groups, oftentimes we’re just trying to survive whatever that may mean to you. And usually that means we’re operating from a place of fear or protection. But what if we could learn that coming into power together doesn’t mean we have to diminish our power in order for the group’s power to be realized when we come together in community and work and family and relationship in our country. It doesn’t mean that someone has to lose power. It doesn’t mean that someone has to lessen who they are, but we must honor that. Personal power is not the power and it doesn’t need to be seen by everyone in order for your personal power to be true. So how do we maintain this balance? How do we find import within ourselves? How do we remember our internal power? And also honor the power of the group?
(17:58):
Enter the word humility, humbleness. This is what I’m learning. This is what is a fresh edge for me, somewhere in my mind, humility meant think less of yourself. I don’t know why. It’s just my experience. Diminish yourself. Don’t be too loud, don’t make too much noise. Don’t let your opinion be heard. CS Lewis has a great, great, great quote on humility. Humility is not thinking less of yourself, but thinking of yourself less. It’s not all about you, boo. It really isn’t. Humility is not thinking of yourself as powerless, but it’s not being so concerned about your personal power having to be validated by the group.
(19:01):
That’s humility. Just think of the next meeting you have, whether it’s in person or online. Just notice what your nervous system does as you start thinking about talking to those people. Maybe it’s our annual meeting today. What if it wasn’t about you? What if you didn’t need that next meeting to validate anything about yourself, but you bring the valid power that you are into that meeting? That’s a very different vibe. Can you feel that? Alright, here’s some words, some ideas to support your practice. This comes from a guy just stumbled upon some Dutch dude named Alexander Deneer. He said to anyone interested in inspiration. I’m assuming that’s why we’re here. Yeah, but so power together. It’s not just about being inspired. We want to inspire anyone want to inspire anyone to live a better life? Yes. Okay. So to inspire people, don’t show them your superpowers. Show them theirs. Help them see the power that they have.
(20:14):
Here’s another one to help the practice. This is very practical. I learned this at the Old Town School of folk music. When I worked on the program manager staff, we would have a meeting once a week and the director at the time said two or three before me. Anytime he goes into a meeting, he had an actor background, so he was used to speaking out. He practices letting two or three people speak before he speaks practical, two or three before me. And then lastly, we got to come back to Ernie Ernest Holmes. He’s my homie. I call him Ernie. Unity never means uniformity. It never means uniformity as much as we want it, because we do. Unity does not mean uniformity.
(21:18):
Some questions that aren’t necessarily, there’s a practice of this comes out of the philosophical tradition. I think it’s really more important to ask questions of ourselves rather than to seek answers. Because usually when there’s an answer that we try to get, there’s a period at the end of it and it’s done. But questions keep us open. We stay in that beginner’s mindset. So here’s some questions for you to think about as we go into this week. Have you ever been in a group or situation where you have felt powerless? What might you do differently in the future if you’re blaming your powerlessness on what someone else said or didn’t do? Okay, fair enough. We all impact one another, but as we explored in the first two weeks, the most powerful potent power comes from within. So in those situations, what could you do differently? Could you ask for something? Could you literally raise your hand? Could you leave a room? Whatever you need to do, then for those of us who have bigger personalities, have a loud booming baritone voice to recognize the temptations to push your power, because it’s tempting. Let me be heard. Let me be seen. Let me make my point. Dammit.
(22:55):
What is a good response when we notice this rise up in ourselves, what could we do differently? And then finally, empowerment. The word empower to bring power in. So empower together. What does that mean to you? There isn’t a right answer. Just what does that mean to you? How might we practice empowering in this community and in the greater community that you live? One of the answers that I will offer today comes in our last reading, if we can go to the next slide. To be beautiful means to be yourself. You don’t need to be accepted by others. You need to accept yourself first. When you are born a lotus flower, be a lotus flower. Don’t try to be a magnolia flower. If you crave acceptance and recognition and try to change yourself to fit what other people want you to be, you will suffer all of your life. True happiness and true power. Lie in understanding and accepting yourself, having confidence in yourself. And I would add to this, that if you find yourself trying to get other people to mold to that uniformity, that is easier. You’re going to suffer for the rest of your life.
(24:24):
Happiness and true power lives in understanding the other lives in accepting everyone else. It’s found in having confidence and trust in others. This is not an intellectual activity, folks. This is a way of living. This is a practice instead of me. We’re shifting to we the I am in the midst of the we are. You need to sing your song in the larger orchestra of this world, but you got to listen. You can’t just listen to yourself. You have to listen to the rest of the music that’s playing. There’s an amazing thing that’s been happening for the past 86 days, I think Reverend David Alexander from the Center for Spiritual Living. Atlanta has this 100 days of mindfulness leading up to our election. So for the past 80 plus days, he’s had this thing where basically around nine ish o’clock, central standard time, you get a phone call and there’s a recorded message that is anchored in some sort of affirmative thought as it relates to stepping into our election that’s more about a consciousness and a spirit as opposed to issues.
(25:51):
And it’s been a very, very, very, very powerful experience for me. It’s not too late. I’ll see if I can pull it up after service or maybe we can throw it up online. You just text a number, it’s free, and you get a message. And we’ve still got, as opposed to all the other text messages that I’m getting from every other possible campaign right now. Good Lord, it’s so refreshing. And I want to close today with sharing. I got to participate and offer three different days. But on Saturday, this Reverend Charles M. Taylor from the Universal Truth Center of Florida. And this is the thing that’s so cool. This is what I love about David Alexander, is he’s a gatherer. He didn’t just try to make it about his own center or about him. He asked everyone that he knows and didn’t know. Hey, I want you to record something and hear are the themes that we’re bringing forward, like rewiring, flow, kindness, compassion. And then you just let people record three minutes and you listen to it and it anchors you. But Charles Taylor from the center in Florida offered these words of affirmation. And I think if you let these sit in and settle in tonight and today, and as we move into the annual meeting and as you move into the week, this is a way of us finding the balance that power within and the power together. Take a deep breath in.
(27:14):
As you exhale, close your eyes if it feels good, or at least just lower your attention down. I am not better or worse than anyone else. No one else is better or worse than me. My perspective is only one perspective. There are infinite perspectives. I honor and appreciate diversity. I learn from others. I keep an open mind. I am tolerant. I am accepting. I am compassionate. Everyone is always doing their very best. I am always doing my very best. I’m not better or worse than anyone else. No one else is better or worse than me. My perspective is only one perspective. There are infinite perspectives. I honor and appreciate diversity. I learn from others. I keep an open mind. I am tolerant. I am accepting. I am compassionate. Everyone. Everyone is doing their best just as I am always doing my very best. May we all honor the diversity of perspectives in our community. And so it is. Amen.