OVERVIEW
Join us as we kick off our November Theme ~ YOUR LIFE YOUR GIFT What if we stopped trying to control, manage and manipulate everything to get what we need? How much mental, emotional and even physical energy might we gain to use on other areas of our living if we could stop worrying about EVERYTHING ALL THE TIME? Phew, yes please. This Sunday we’ll explore offering any and all things to God, Spirit, Light, the Universe. You aren’t alone.
TRANSCRIPTION
Thank you. Thank you. I love language. Don said, Darrell’s gonna throw it down or throw down. Sometimes I just love language. It’s so funny. And in the way that negation means something positive, put some sta on it. <laugh>, put your foot in it. Anyway, <laugh> so bad. It’s good. Good morning everyone. I am overjoyed to be with all of you in the room. I’m overjoyed to be with you out in the ethers and the worldwide Websters. We are here to kick off this month’s theme of your life, your gift, talking about abundance, talking about prosperity, talking about sufficiency, talking about sustainability and it all being wrapped in your consciousness. What we think, what we believe about ourself and relationship to life.
The book that is a focus. And if you are into reading along, I highly recommend it. It’s a great book, Tosha Silver. It’s Not Your Money. And I was really intrigued by it when I first got into it and I’ve focusing on the first two chapters and I’ve just been for the past three weeks, like reading and rereading and reading and rereading and grateful for the way that it’s pushing me into a new relationship with my understanding of prosperity. And I’m setting my timer here. I want to commit to being a little bit more timely. I get excited sometimes and keep talking.
So I am utterly Your own is the title of the talk. And I grabbed it from the last line of a prayer that Tosha has in the book. It’s called the Change Me Prayer. And so I am utterly your own, is kind of the culminating phrase at the end of this prayer about change me into an avenue that is free to give and free to receive. I am utterly your own God, spirit, universe, life, whatever the language is that works for you. And if you hear nothing else today, I want you to walk away feeling and understanding that you are not alone. Because most of us walk through the world as if. So the description, the idea being presented today is what if we stop trying to control, manage and manipulate everything to get what we need? Just let that land for a minute. We all, not some of us, not those people over there that you don’t like the way they control and manage all of us, including you, stopped controlling, managing and manipulating yourself and others to get what you think you need. How much mental, emotional, and even physical energy might you gain to put into the actual act of living?
Not controlling, living, celebrating dancing. We just celebrated Tiffany’s birthday dancing
We are constantly trying to control everything all the time,
Everything all the time right now, all of you are sitting here, but I guarantee there’s some little thing in the background that’s trying to control. Thinking about lunch. What am I gonna do this week? Is Darryl actually only gonna talk for 20 minutes? Is there some way that I can get right in my head around time? Our minds are just multitaskers like crazy and it’s okay. And we can do something to be in right relationship with that. Not change it, but to be present with it and to practice letting go. That’s one of the big themes that comes out of this book. So I’m under, I’m gonna close today with the full Change Me prayer, but what Rob read and what I’m going to reread right now is just kind of like a condensed version to get us into the groove of this talk today. To put our foot in it, put some sta on it. Okay, Divine beloved, change me into someone. So let’s just stop right there. Most of the time we pray to change other people. Hey, we change, we try to change other people. We try to change other conditions. This prayer starts off Divine Beloved, change me. Okay? We could just stop right there and be like, all right, but it goes on. Change me into someone who can give with complete ease and abundance. Knowing you are the unlimited source of all. Oh,
Let me be an easy open conduit for your prosperity. So this is where she gets into the language and playing with language of that. It’s not mine when we say it’s my debt, it’s my money, it’s my problem. We kind of shut the door on spirit. You’re not alone. There’s something that is moving through you. So the prosperity of life, the prosperity of the world. Let me trust that all of my own needs are always met in amazing ways and it is safe to give freely as my heart guides me.
How many times have you wanted to do something? And it doesn’t always have to be money, but it’s a tangible thing that we can play with. But how many times have you even wanted to call someone and you’re like, Oh no, no, I don’t think I’m gonna call them. That’s, that’s not giving freely. Whether you think there’s not enough time, maybe you don’t want to get into the whole story of whatever their life is about, but you know that there’s something that you can give them by calling them and saying, Hello, I love you. I’m just reaching out and you don’t let me trust that all of my own needs are always met in amazing ways. And it is safe to give freely as my heart guides me. Change me into one who can fully love, forgive and accept myself. So I may carry your light without restriction. Let everything that needs to go let everything that needs to come. I am utterly your own.
So I started off talking about language cuz I have to just do a little disclosure and disclaimer just about where I am in my personal journey. This book invites language to me that makes God something. Anthropomorphize is the word, right? It’s like a thing with a personality. And I have fought a lot of my adult life trying to let that go. Why? Because I treat it like a parent that I don’t want to have upset with me. And there’s this idea we put ourselves into this weird relationship that we have to somehow be good enough to get. But there’s something beautiful about the language. The Tosha likes to refer to God as she and love. And the language that she uses is ultimately inviting the reader and the practitioner and those of us here today into an intimate relationship with an intimate relationship. When you feel your lives too hard, go have a talk with God. Yes. And are you talking to God when life isn’t hard? That this month of November is about Thanksgiving. Intimacy is being with someone when they’re at seven in the morning and they’re not looking their best and being with them when they’re at their best. Intimacy is being with someone, always cultivating relationship.
This changed me prayers about cultivating an intimate relationship with the source of life itself. The challenge is, is that there isn’t really an intellectual understanding that’s going to serve you. And this is where our modern world, I think we break down a little bit. We have so much data. We’ve got all these algorithms, which I love. They streamline life. But we think we need to know everything. We want to control it. We don’t want the discomfort of not knowing of uncertainty. But the secret of this book and the secret of the practice that we’re gonna be exploring this whole month here at Cityside is actually the practice of letting go as well as embracing. I really enjoy within this prayer that it’s not just about letting me give, but it’s also we need to be able to receive. I have a hard time receiving. I know that’s one side of the equation that I always need to stretch myself on. And it brought me to Joseph Campbell. And one of my favorite quotes from him is, We must be willing to get rid of the life we’ve had planned so as to have the life that is awaiting us. But we do a number on ourselves and we’re like, Yes, that sounds awesome, but how do I make it happen?
I’m gonna stay right here until I know that life that I, that’s awaiting me. I know A, B, and C, how to get there? Anyone? We get a little immobilized as if you know, know me at all. I’m all about the soul, Jim, right? I want to work out my soul. I want to exercise it. I want to practice, I want to engage in things. And the practice that Tosha invites the reader into here is this idea of offering it up when you don’t know what to do and you don’t have the control that you think you had. What if you just said, Dear God, I let go of thinking I need to control and accept your wisdom to guide this situation or circumstance perfectly.
But you may. But what does that mean? I don’t know. How does God know? How am I gonna know if God knows that’s not your business? Your business is to let go and open up. Often when I’m teaching mindfulness and meditation, I get people to think about a receptive mindset just to be able to sit in the stillness. Most of us are in an excited state throughout the day, right? We’re in the sympathetic nervous system. What bring it. Okay, all right. Okay. All right. But still, I’m gonna stay right here. So look at my hands right now. What can I hold in my hands besides this microphone? Nothing. If you wanted to come up and give me a delicious slice of pizza not happening, you can lay it on top of my hand. What’s gonna fall off? Letting go. In the act of letting go, we actually receive, we open up space. And this is what this change me prayer is all about. This is what is being invited of us to let go of thinking about money as ours. It’s just a thing that we use to transmit energy to one another. The energy of the divine, the creativity of the divine, the sufficiency of the divine. Now I just gotta speak point on the nose to money.
Tosha says, Resting in divine source is independent of great wealth. I’m gonna say that again. Resting in divine source is independent of great wealth. I see a couple of furrow brows. Wealth is not the indicator of abundance. It’s not check in with your body right now. It is so abundant in what it’s doing and what it has do. How many cells are in your body? Definitely more zeros than what are in your bank account, I’m sure. But think about that four minute wealth is not the thing it is. It is a tangible marker that we use, that we agree upon. But wealth is not the thing that lets you know that abundance and sufficiency is available. It’s just a thing. It is not the thing. So resting in divine source is independent of great wealth. And the reason she states that is that we do a number on ourselves in the spiritual world that if we don’t have the wealth, then we are not in right mind what’s in their consciousness. They’re totally lack and limitation all the time.
What if living and resting in the divine had nothing to do with your bank account? The feeling rest, resting in the divine moment by moment to go, Yes, I know that all my needs are met that I can give freely, that I can receive freely. What needs to go will go and what needs to come will come. I’m totally your own. That freedom, that space of that to me is abundance. That is the palpable sensation of freedom. But we like to look on our, pull up the balance on our checking account. I do it too cuz it helps me do things. It helps me buy the coffee that I offer things up. So here’s the invitation. It’s not about getting to some intellectual understanding and going, Oh, okay, I get what Darrell’s saying. So now I’m just good for the rest of my life cuz I’m just gonna float an abundance.
I don’t know about you, but life happens. Something is going to happen big or small that is gonna cause a feeling of constriction in your body. Whether you get short of breath, whether you physically tighten up your muscles or you feel yourself constricting around friends and family and people, you’re just withdrawing. You’re like, Ah, I don’t know if I wanna give all my energy to those folks. When you feel that constriction, whether it’s physical, mental or emotional, it doesn’t mean that you don’t know what abundance is. It doesn’t mean that you’re not conscious enough in your prosperity thinking. It’s simply an opportunity to come back to letting go and offering up. I’m feeling constricted right now divine, but I know that there is enough for myself and everyone, so I’m going to give myself freely and receive freely.
And then you keep walking down the street and all of a sudden another thought pops in and you feel the constriction happening again and you offer it up again. It becomes a dance popping and locking. I mean you’re just like second by second depending upon the kind of day you’re having. You may be saying this over and over and over again. That’s the work, that’s the out. And when it comes to money. I’ve grown up in the church and been in all kinds of different communities and whenever money comes into the conversation, especially when it’s like now it’s time to pass the hat, or now we’re gonna talk about tithing or now we’re gonna talk about giving to the community, you can feel the air just go out of the room <laugh>, right? And there’s like resentment and anger that comes to play. Because if life, this is just Darryl’s track, you may not be thinking this. If God is so good and God is so abundant, then why does the church need to ask for money? They should just, there’s this magical thinking that it should just flow. But it’s the actual asking that any community does that is the that’s that moment. Not trying to make people constrict, but it’s an opportunity to offer once again to let go open up the hand. But we think we’re letting think, we’re letting our source go, but it’s source that’s moving through us.
How many of you watch Netflix? How much do you pay for that a month? 25 bucks. How many of you watch Hulu? How much do you pay for that a month? You probably don’t even know. They just raise their rates.
What other services do you do on a monthly basis? Amazon guy, a tv. We do this autopay thing all the time for these things. And then we show up in a community like this and we’re like, Oh, let me see how much I got in my wallet today. Well sorry, I don’t have anything and I’m not trying to put any judgment on that, but I’m just calling it into the room because it’s been a part of my experience and I’m assuming if it’s been a part of mine then it’s been a part of some other folks’ experience. The constriction that we feel around giving, especially to community or to organizations is an opportunity not to be in pain, not to bleed ourselves, but the very fact that we feel some discomfort is actually a good thing.
If you want to work out your core muscles, you don’t go, Oh well I don’t really wanna be uncomfortable. So no, you gotta get down on the floor and hold plank for 60 seconds. You gotta do some crunches, you gotta do some side bends and tomorrow you’re gonna wake up and be like, Dang, I really worked out. You’re gonna be sore. And it’s gonna be an indicator that you are stretching yourself beyond the current function of your body. It’s a good thing when we feel that discomfort around abundance in our life. Don’t take it as a sign that you aren’t enough, that you don’t know abundance enough. You are hitting the wall, the edge where you could step into a new expression of greatness.
Yes.
And this is not just about money, this is about love. Whether it’s romantic love, whether it’s familial love, whether it’s friendships even with your pet, you feel that urge to just kind of like constrict. But what if you offered it up and said, I’m feeling really tight right now divine, but I know that all of my needs are going to met and I’m here. I am totally yours. Use me in this moment. Let your abundant nature let your sufficiency flow through me today in ways that I can’t figure out. I’m gonna let go of control. Cuz I’ve been trying to do it for 49 years and obviously I can only get so far. Do you feel me on that? So here’s the change me prayer. Take a deep breath in, exhale and close your eyes. And I’m gonna read it two times to close our talk today.
Divine beloved, change me into someone who can give with complete ease and abundance. Knowing you are the unlimited source of all. Let me be an easy, open conduit for your prosperity. Let me trust that all of my own needs are always met in amazing ways and it is safe to give freely as my heart guides me. And equally, please change me into someone who can feel wildly open to receiving. Let me know my own value, my own beauty and worthiness without question. Let me allow others the supreme pleasure of giving to me. Let me feel worthy to receive in every possible way. And let me extend kindness to all who need feeling compassion and understanding. And even the hardest situations change me into one who can fully love, forgive and accept myself. So I may carry your light without restriction. Let everything that needs to go, let everything that needs to come. I am utterly your own divine beloved. Change me into someone who can give with complete ease and abundance. Knowing you are the unlimited source of all. Let me be an easy, open conduit for your prosperity. Let me trust that all of my own needs are always met in an amazing way and it is safe to give freely as my heart guides. And equally, please change me into someone who can feel wildly open to receiving.
Let me know my own value, beauty and worthiness without question. Let me allow others the supreme pleasure of giving to me. Let me feel worthy to receive in every possible way. And let me extend kindness to all who need feeling compassion and understanding. And even the hardest situations change me into one who can fully love, forgive and accept myself. So I may carry your light without restriction. Let everything that needs to go, let everything that needs to come. I am utterly your own. You are me, I am you. We are one all as well. And so it is. I challenge you this week to offer all of your hardships and your celebrations up. Just take a moment and say, I don’t, I’m offering this up. Work with me. I am utterly your own. And so it is.