Self-Love for Collective Change – Rev. Rainbow Weldon
This recording features the Sunday Talk portion of the service. For the full service watch here.
DESCRIPTION
Our life’s journey is to learn to love and honor ourselves as unique expressions of the Divine…even in our beautiful, messy humanness. In this message, we’ll explore self-love as a sacred path of healing and possibility, one that empowers us to live our values and help create a more just and loving world.
SUMMARY
The key points from the transcript are:
– Rev. Rainbow Weldon emphasizes the importance of self-love and embracing all parts of oneself, including the “messy” and difficult aspects. She shares her own journey of grief and transformation, and how it has deepened her self-love and trust in herself.
– She provides practices to cultivate self-love, such as keeping one’s word, listening to one’s inner guidance, and speaking one’s truth gently. She highlights that self-love is not about ignoring pain or pretending everything is okay, but rather facing feelings authentically and remembering one’s wholeness.
– Rev. Rainbow suggests that self-love is a radical act of collective transformation, as when we truly know, trust, and love ourselves, we can embody our values and inspired action to create positive change in the world. She invites the audience to contemplate what it would look like to embody self-love in a way that blesses the world.
– The transcript ends with a prayer affirming the oneness, love, and freedom that is the essence of all being, and the invitation to walk embodied in this truth, showing up as a blessing to the world.
TRANSCRIPTION
This transcription was auto-generated, please excuse typos, errors and omissions.
Rev. Rainbow Weldon:
I want to see you all. Alright, good morning. Good morning. Grand Rising. Oh, so grateful to be here with you all and in Chicago, the city that always has my heart. For those of you who may or may not know, I am currently residing in Lexington, Kentucky, where I serve as the spiritual director at A CSL there called Aha Bus Center for Spiritual Living. And happy to get to be here today with you all. Yes. So I want to begin with this quote from Brene Brown, one of my favorites. Anyone else? Brown fans? Yes. Yes. Okay. They need a word. There’s like swifties. Is there a word We need a word for? Like Brene brownies. Yeah, we’ll be brownies. All right. So she says, owning our story and loving ourselves through the process is the bravest thing we will ever do.
So this hits me, right? That is so true. And I don’t know about you all, but recently life has been lifeing. And through that process I have kou and understand the opportunity to love myself even more, especially those parts of myself, of ourselves that we would rather not have to deal with or hide away. Those parts that are the messy self are parts of us that often are those wounds, triggers the awkwardness, the doubt, the grief, all of it. And yet what I’ve come to discover through my life experience is through truly embracing and integrating all of that I can stand more firm in the truth of who I am. Yes, everything is the holy fertile ground where transformation begins if we’re willing to shift our perspective as such to see it that way. And if we’re willing to look within and love ourselves through the unknown, through the change, through the doubts, through the and in the science of mind, Dr.
Ernest Holmes reminds us that love is the very nature of God, life, spirit. And through the power of love, we can let go of the past and begin again. We are always at choice. We always have the opportunity to know and see ourselves anew, to see each other, to see the world anew by knowing that God is love, and love is who we are. And love is not a static thing, just like life isn’t static. We are always growing and expanding into a deeper understanding of what that means. Divine love is our true essence. It’s the very nature of who we are. So when we look at it this way, we know then that self-love is not indulgent about being selfish, it’s not arrogance. It self-love is living in alignment with that true divine nature, embodying the love that we are and grounding ourselves in this infinite presence and being open to be that vessel, that channel, that instrument of spirit to allow its love to be known in even greater ways through us.
So we heard earlier the reading from the book of this month that we at Aha var are also studying along with this CSL global themes from Han. And he said that feelings flow in us like a river. Each feeling is like a drop of water in that river. And some are refreshing, some are healing. Others may be clouded with pain, suffering or misperception. But he reminds us that when we are willing to look within and to explore the depths of the river of our feelings, we can see what has been preventing us from experiencing the joy and the fulfillment and the love and the life that we desire. And in such doing, in doing such, we can transform and shift our perspective to see something new, to be open to a new possibility.
The person who suffers most as he quoted the Buddha, is the person who sees many wrong perceptions and wrong. It’s not like good, bad or wrong. We can read this stuff and then use it as a self-judgment, or I’m not doing this right or I’m not seeing this good enough. So let’s just notice if that’s coming up, perhaps that’s an invitation of something to explore and to heal around. But this idea of seeing rightly or being open to see something from another perspective reminds at least me that what I might be seeing or experiencing in this moment if it feels stuck or limiting it’ss because I’m not open to see it all.
And then I may be like this when there’s something going on here that I just don’t yet have the eyes to see, but I’m willing. So the idea is are you seeing clearly? Are you open to see beyond the limited respect perception of what is showing up in your life today? Because our suffering is not always in the thing. It’s itself, the life occurrence or events or the shift that is occurring, but in the story and the meaning we make of it in the story we tell ourselves about it, those old often core wounds that come up about, I’m not lovable, I’m not enough, I’ll never be good enough, those kind of things. These are the example of these wrong perceptions because the ultimate truth of life is the oneness of the universe of God that is love, that is all possibility, pure potentiality reality.
So these wrong perceptions can keep us trapped in the limited experience in our life, and Holmes would put it in his words by saying, when we forget that we are an individualized expression of the one life of spirit, we live in error or we live in separation, we can start to think that things in life are happening to us and that if only those people over there did A, B or C, things would be much better for ourselves are the world. But homes reminds us that we have the power and the potential that seed lives within us and the power to change the world, so to speak, lives in us, embodying that love and that potential and that power within self-love isn’t about ignoring the pain or pretending everything is okay and it’s so easy to go to numbing out through whatever vice or Netflix and chill whatever it may be.
And not that that’s bad. Again, it’s what is the intention behind the actions that you are taking? So choosing to face the river honestly, to feel the feelings authentically and to remember that we can choose in each and every moment again and again to remember our wholeness, to remember who we are, and the more we do our work to discover, cover the depths of our own river, the depths of our own being that is blossoming and as to who we are becoming, we start to know ourselves more and love ourselves more so that we can show up in the world in a way that makes the most beneficial impact, creating that ripple effect. So I have had one experience after the other in the past year and a half that has called me to a deeper level of self-love than I even knew was possible.
I’ve always been someone that felt like I had a really healthy relationship with loving myself. I know others that have really struggled with that area and anyone else ever been humbled by something when they thought that they’ve already had that life lesson learned and then something comes along. So some of you may know, and I just have to bring her energy and presence into this room, but my mom, Louise Weldon was such a beyond words but anchor in my life and a part of many of your lives as well. And so she made her transition about a year and a half ago, and as much as I was prepared and accepting that that was the right and perfect journey for her, the grief that hits that surprised me in a way was that feeling of being completely untethered, uprooted. Who am I? Right? Those of you who have been around and known me long enough were knew me 20 some years ago when my dad died, and I was in practitioner class with Reverend Amy and let’s see, anyone else you all might know still, I don’t know.
And so here I am now only child and fairly young in life. I would say it’s all perspective. It’s all the story we tell ourselves and both of my parents have died. And that feeling of being untethered or orphaned, that’s what surprised me the most. And it was the biggest invitation to lean into a deeper awareness of who I am and my own inner strength as rainbow. Not Louise’s daughter or John’s daughter or any of those things. But who am I in the world today standing on my own two feet and my own strength and power and to love and know myself enough to actually take the actions in my life to live in such a way that honors myself? Does that make sense? Like I said, I love myself, but yet I’m still in relationships that I’m not showing up fully. I’m still holding back on certain things and not speaking my voice as clearly as I would like to.
So through this year, all of that has been, and when you’re a leader in a particularly unique experience of being the senior minister, spiritual director of a community who is also leading a community, living these teachings and experiencing the deepest heartache, hardest time of life and grief ever to wake up each day and to be in that question of what’s it all for? Who am I? This is my one precious life as rainbow in this unique experience right here, right now. I’m not saying that it’s finite. We know that we are infinite, but in this incarnation right here, right now, on this planet at this time, with all that I have experienced, who I am now is a unique gift to the world. So how can I love myself so fully, know myself so fully and begin to trust myself so fully that I can live in that authenticity and integrity and to show up and be willing to be fully authentic when those waves of grief show up and to allow that river of feelings to flow, and it gives others permission to do the same. Yes.
So the awkwardness, the ways that I may have judged myself in the past, I now completely embrace as the uniqueness of who I am today, and it’s the exact places where spirit gets to shine through. So treating myself with that level of love and compassion and just allowing myself to be wherever I’m at in that moment is a practice of self-love, right? And it’s a daily practice isn’t just like having a healthy self-esteem, deeply tried, tied to trust. This has been my journey recently. Trust is that fertile ground where the strength and the courage to live authentically and to demonstrate love and action comes. And when we don’t trust ourselves, we can second guess. We can stay silent and we can just kind of let things be as they are, but then we are showing up in life as a kind of reaction to whatever’s going on around us. But I don’t know about you, but I would much prefer to show up with intention instead of showing up in reaction. We talk a lot here about the idea of responsibility, personal responsibility in our self-growth process. And I love this idea of responsibility is the ability to respond, but there’s often a pause, at least for me that occurs from when something’s happening in life, we can react or we can take that pause and consciously with intention respond to what is occurring.
And so this journey of trusting myself, it’s not trusting our ego or our personality, but it’s trusting that’s something within knows and then something powerful begins to happen when we begin to live and embody that and take up more space in our life in whatever way that may look like for you to speak from that place of truth, to advocate for a world that reflects the love and the dignity and the justice and the equity that we know is possible, creating that world that works for all. So building trust isn’t just a one-time decision, it’s a daily practice. And just like anything I’ve noticed, it can start with something that seems so simple, but not necessarily easy. So I’m going to give you a few practices that has allowed me to move into this more integrated, embodied level of self-awareness, self knowingness, and they all kind of go together and then self-expression.
So in order to know ourselves and trust that inner guidance and trust who we are, it’s keeping our word, okay? Well, it is for me, often easier to keep my word to someone else than it is to keep my word to myself when no one else knows. It is something in here, right? Yes, I’m going to wake up and do this practice tomorrow and I’m going to start my day with intention. And then the alarm goes, snoo, snoo, snoo. Like, well, right? But those are the ways that starting small. What are those things you told yourself you were going to do in order to practice self-love? Start small, right? When you say you’re going to do something for yourself, follow through and keep that integrity in order to build that inner accountability and integrity.
The other one is listen, spend time each day listening and asking, what do I know to be true in my soul that something within me knows? And going to that place, especially if you notice something in the world, in the news, in your relationship and whatever experience, somebody walking down the street and saying something, if that trigger comes up, pause. What do I know to be true about this situation in my soul? And then from there, we have that awareness as we’re listening to ourselves more to put our energy and attention towards that which our soul knows to be true, not the triggered ego and thoughts, right?
Speak up gently practice saying what you think and feel in safe spaces, and then your voice begins to grow stronger the more you use it. So one of the, I’m trying to find the right word here, but anyway, one of the outcomes or another kind of surprising plot twist you could say that came to me through me through this process, and obviously it’s very nuanced in and there’s a lot to be known about it, but to put it simply through my grief process and learning to know and love and be there for myself in that process and know myself and trust myself more. Also then came another shift in my relationship so that some of you may know my partner, Heather and I have been together about 17 years, but about nine months ago we decided to separate. And we have a beautiful daughter who’s now nine and a half, some of you again, no cadence. She’s doing great. And we are still consciously co-parenting and navigating all of that with as much love and intention and consciousness as we can.
And sometimes when life is lifeing and everything seems to be shaking up, we can look at it as, I can’t believe this is happening, or the chaos or the drama, or we can choose to see it as this too is me. And live into that fully embodied practice of knowing ourselves and loving ourselves so fully that we no longer put ourselves second, that we no longer compromise our values, our integrity. So this journey of self-love and self-trust and getting to know myself all over again in this midlife, it’s important to remember to celebrate the small wins and to notice those times when you do act on that inner voice, that guidance, acknowledge it. I think a great practice is, I love writing and journaling and all of that. So write it down something that may seem smaller, insignificant, like asking for your food to go back like, oh, this really isn’t what I wanted. I don’t know about you all, but I’m a recovering people pleaser.
It’s okay to advocate for what you want. These small little things are examples though of how we can embody this love even more and begin to build evidence to your own inner self that you are trustworthy. And what I’ve discovered, it’s really building evidence with my inner rainbow that she can trust adult rainbow to let her be free for the quirky queer weirdness that she is that, I mean, I was joking with my friend the other day about, she just laughs. She was just like, we’re just sitting there talking. Then I’m like, Ooh, I just have to stretch. I just don’t sit normally in a chair and sit still. That’s just not who I am. But yet, for many years I was conditioned to think that this is what you’re supposed to do.
I was recently at a justice ministry conference and I would notice how I would be uncomfortable, just, it’s just hard. I would be cold or no, actually I got really hot at one point midlife, and I was like, I’m going to get up. And I was like, gave myself permission to go stand in the back corner by the water and stretch or sit on the chair and some people would look and I’m like, I really don’t care what other people think. I’m not disrupt. There’s a difference, right? I’m mindful, I’m aware I’m not going to stand right here and be like in the middle of someone speaking, but I’m also going to listen to what my body needs and honor that and not be like I have to sacrifice myself somehow to fit in. Because you probably have talked a good bit here about this idea of belonging that Brene Brown talks about and how belonging is not fitting in.
It’s creating a space where everyone can be uniquely who they are. So the more we trust ourselves, the more we fully step into our divine power, and that is the exact power that we need to co-create this world that works for all. So invite us now to anchor this truth with an affirmation. You can speak it out loud, repeat after me or hold it silently. But I invite you to use your voice, move that energy if that feels good to you. So I’ll read it, invite you to say it after me. I no longer shrink to fit the fears of others. I no longer shrink to fit the fears of others. I will not abandon my own voice to please others. I will not abandon my own voice to please others. I trust myself. I speak my truth. I trust myself. I speak my truth.
And lastly, I create solutions born from love, not fear. I create create solutions. Born from love, not fear. That’s right. So here’s the thing, when we embody self-love, we naturally begin to live our values and in integrity with who we are and the unique divine expression we are here to be and express and share with the world. And that begins to create that ripple effect in our community. So when I say self-love for collective change, it’s basically be yourself. Show up and show up with that which you can often see in the world and say or think you wish would change again. It goes back to that simple adage, be the change you seek in the world. It’s simple, but it’s not easy, but it’s simple. And the more we can remind ourselves and lean into the supportive community with others that are kind of walking this walk and wanting to do things this way, the more we can create those ripples of change as the science and mind reminds us that we can change the way.
When we change consciousness, the world we see and experience that is reflected around us. Self-love is like that stone dropped in the pond that begins to create those ripples from your heart into the world. And loving yourself is not just personal. It’s a radical act of collective transformation. Do you get that? It’s a radical act of collective transformation. When you know yourself, trust yourself, love yourself, and then be that self in the world listening to that call of spirit in your heart to take that inspired action to embody the values that you desire. So you ready for your homework this week? The invitation. Here’s your invitation. What would it look like to embody love for yourself in a way that also blesses the world? Contemplate that journal it, ask it, take it into meditation. What would it look like to embody love for yourself in a way that also blesses the world? Maybe it’s speaking up when silence is easier. Maybe it’s resting when the world tells you to keep hustling and grinding. Maybe it’s forgiving yourself so that love and compassion can flow more freely through you. So just take a moment now, feel into your bodies. Maybe even place your hand over your heart. Take that deep breath and ask yourself, what would it look like? What embody love for myself in a way that blesses the world?
And may we walk this path of embodied self love, not just for our own healing, but as a gift of healing and transformation for the world, and staying right here in this energy and presence. Let’s take it into prayer. Yes, yes. What I know and recognize is that there is one life, one presence that is love, that is wholeness, that is freedom. This energy of the divine itself, getting to know itself more fully in as in through all of us, this love embodied, knowing that there is only one life, one thing expressing right here, right now. I know that it is the very essence and nature and truth of my being. And as I know this freedom and love and joy to be who I am, I know this must absolutely be the very essence and nature and life of each and every being in this world and beyond.
So from this place of oneness, I speak this word right here, right now, knowing that love is always the answer. Love will find a way. Love is expressing itself right here, right now through each of us, and as we open our minds and hearts to see rightly, to be open to new possibilities, to experience a shift in perspective that all things are made new and right here, right now, in this eternal now moment, there is the opportunity to be love, to be the change, and to be that catalyst for healing that we desire for ourselves, for others, and the world.
So I know as we move from this moment throughout the rest of our day, throughout the rest of the week, that we walk embodied, embodying the love and the freedom and the joy of life itself, showing up as that blessing to the world, as we know in love and trust ourselves more fully. And to remember that we are never alone when the circumstances in life shift as such, when those plot twists come, I know right here, right now that there is something greater unfolding and that the presence and the power of the divine itself is right where we are. We are never alone.
We had the strength and the power to show up and to be who we are becoming in each and every moment as the very love and essence of life itself. Yes. So I’m just so grateful, so grateful to know this truth and so grateful to know that something grand is happening right here, right now in my life because I choose to see it as such, and I claim that as the truth. So with a great gratitude for the fulfillment of this prayer, I release it now into the action of the law. The law that always says, yes, my beloved. It is done. And it is so. And together we say, and so it is. Yes.